answers

so, i got some answers, and i feel like i'm being scraped up off the floor:
the first is that satan definitely attacked me on friday nite. he is a deceiver and a liar. and i believed his tricks. all i could think on friday was: "do you honestly think GOD is going to answer your prayers? He is only going to make a fool of you. you are going to look and feel so stupid when all of this comes crashing down on you. you've jumped in the water erin, and it's teeming with sharks." i even told the LORD that i wanted to take it all back. that i didn't want Him to answer my prayers, and i'd just like to get back in the boat where it was safe thank you very much...at the time i didn't even think that it was an attack. i questioned everything GOD had shown me the last few days. i doubted.

so i'm a bit beaten up and bruised, but i am rejoicing in my Father's mercy.

the LORD doesn't want to destroy me. He isn't trying to make a fool of me. He wants me out of that stinky, fish smelling boat. He wants me in the water. He wants me to walk. He wants me to stop looking at the boat of safety. He wants me to stop looking at the crashing waves of despair. He wants me to look at Him. He wants me to expect great things.

"my soul, wait thou only upon GOD, for my expectation is from Him."